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Poopy pants

Ratings - Meow edition

Golden Ticket Holder? Seriously, they forgot the name of their own twist on Sunday's show? If I had more time & energy, I'd give them all Willy Wonka pics tonight. Let's see, Dominic as Charlie, Adam as his grandpa, Cassi as the egotistical Veruca Salt, Rachel as competitive Violet Beauregarde, Jeff as Mike Teavee, Lawon as a snazzy dressing Oompa Loompa, etc etc - you get the idea. And of course the wonderful Willy Wonka himself in this spot. "Come with me and you'll be in a world of pure imagination" - also known as the CBS 'reality' show Big Brother. As for the rest of the show, that food comp was even more Human Centipede-ish than the hamsters made it sound.
Paired with Dominic NOMINATED - HOLDS VETO Ups for being one of the stars of tonight's show (like nominees are) and for superb acting surprised, shocked & disappointed at the noms meeting. Also for his everlasting shout-outs to me and more so, to the lovely Fara. His open love and devotion for her may be starting to grate on Rachel.	Paired with Rachel His glee in telling everyone what he thought was an embarrassment for Dominic was ridiculous, but he gets an upgrade to neutral for talking down a very upset Rachel for once, instead of delivering the same lecture that usually just whips up her frenzy. Not that he didn't try that at first, but then he turned into a real boyfriend for a minute and was actually supportive. But sadly for us, that also diffused the situation that is Rachel.
Paired with Shelly This whole 'woe is me, I'm the pretty girl' shtick is so old and sad but she took it to new lows today when she all but declared she was the Cindy Crawford of the habitat. However she redeemed herself by a) taking time & effort to apply warpaint before her showdown with Rachel and b) becoming Mirror-face 2.0. BB5/7 Jase has nothing on her.	Paired with Dick GOLDEN KEY TICKET Once again, I'm all for the veterans getting gone but I have to admit she's an amazing shit stirrer in there. She drops a little bomb here, a little bomb there, and then she sits back to enjoy the show with us. Normally you'd figure she'll be busted and booted for all that, but these are hamsters of very little brain this year.
Paired with Daniele We haven't had a premiere night no-show since BB9 Jacob, and we haven't had a mysterious early exit since BB9 Neil. These pairs twist seasons just seem to complicate things for production. No real word yet on why Dick's gone (and there may never be) but he sure was looking rough in the premiere.	Paired with Adam NOMINATED - HOLDS VETO He's trying hard to be a big gamer, scurrying here and whispering there, but compared to masters like Daniele and Shelly, he comes across as just a busybody wannabe.
Paired with Jordan Sympathy kudos for being Cassi's first retell victim and having to listen to all that, and then hear it again from Jordan later, and everyone else in between. Making chocolate poopy pants is a childish prank but you can't really blame him with all this going on around him.. at least he gave us and them a diversion for a half hour.	Paired with Jeff HEAD OF HOUSEHOLD Who saw that spot-on in-yer-face advice for Rachel coming from her, when Rachel was her most upset? Not me. She did an incredible job and said all the right things. It's just too bad Rachel probably only heard the bits she wanted to. Jordan had social skills deluxe her first season and it seems she's only fine-tuned them since then, and I give her credit for handling this week as well as she has. She's never been HOH with a full house before and it's a tough job for someone as well-connected socially as she is.
Paired with Lawon Many dislike her but I still think she's okay. I might change that later on if she sticks and/or when she starts to repeat herself. But so far most of her many stories are new, to me anyway, and that's a good thing. Anyway, she's barely there with all this chaos going on.	Paired with Porsche He claimed to be a fan since BB1 but even watching only CBS, he clearly wasn't paying attention: who throws a veto comp when they're on the block? He went in with a clearly outlined womanizing strategy which failed miserably, he set off another BB Weinergate, and he panicked himself right out the door.
Paired with Kalia Easy ups for his ruffled shirt outfit (that he kept on til the wee hours), and especially for his superb reaction upon hearing Cassi's version of The Spat. It was very quick but it was classic. Sorry, I didn't get the timestamp but trust me, it was good.	Paired with Keith GOLDEN KEY They all keep saying she's crazy but I'm not seeing it - I barely see her at all. She's definitely handicapped in there, having first hitched her wagon to Dick, which might have worked out well for her if he'd stayed but we know how that went. And now she seems most attached to Rachel.. she seems bent on BB suicide.
Paired with Brendon You know tonight's follies are upsworthy, even if it was close to a rerun of so very many other Rachel escapades. No matter how ridiculous her behavior is, she's still just a little sympathetic when she's truly hurt: she's like a 6-year-old little girl who refuses to be consoled. But then she's back to being herself and/or Violet, plus she spoils a perfectly good prank.	Paired with Cassi See Daniele, but Shelly's far more sly about it and she does it with empathy. She's put in a LOT of time listening and supporting Cassi about her insecurities without being condescending, and I'd like to think it's genuine. At the same time, it's going to make it very hard for Cassi to campaign against her.. well played, Shelly. Bonus ups for making a homemade Swiffer today.

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